iGet Abducted
by seddie4thewin
Summary: Nora abducts Freddie by convincing him she has Sam captive. Sam discovers what she's done and goes to his rescue. Just basically Seddie-ness.


**This is going to be a kind of long one-shot to start the new year. I just couldn't resist starting off 2018 with some Seddie.**

Crazy Nora Dershlitt was putting the finishing touches on a photo shopped picture of Sam on her computer. She's been out on parole for less than a week and she's already putting an evil plan into action. She knows her computer skills are nothing compared to Freddie's, but she's hoping to be able to fool him into making an emotional reaction to the picture and then taking advantage of him.

"Let's see, I think the hair should be more messed up if she was fighting." Nora said to her partner in crime. She made a few clicks and used the program on her laptop to make it look as if half of Sam's hair was nearly ripped out. "And she should definitely have a black eye."

Deep down inside, Nora knew that Sam would turn her inside-out if she even tried to hit her in the face, but just messing up a photo of the blonde made her feel strangely good. When she was done, it was a pretty convincing picture if not looked at too closely. Sam was tied to a chair, beaten and bruised and Nora smirked to her pet chicken. "What do you think, Maurice?"

"Baaawwk." The tan colored chicken grumbled. Which in chicken means either, "Feed me!" or "I need to lay an egg!"

"Don't worry, baby. Nora will have her day. Tomorrow as a matter of fact, is that day. Tomorrow I will make Freddie Benson mine. He'll be my boyfriend and make sweet, sweet lovin' to me." She snorted a laugh.

"Baaawwk!" The chicken looked at her like she was insane.

* * *

Back in Seattle, Freddie had just settled in to spend some time on his term paper for a class he was nearly through with. He and Sam were back together as a couple and had been for over a year, unknown to Nora. Sam was taking some classes at the local community college herself, but had taken a semester off to spend some time with her mother, who was helping Sam's grandmother prepare to move into a senior apartment complex. Pam and Sam were a couple of hours away, in Olympia, visiting some relatives for a week.

The couple sent a few texts back and forth with the intent of a nice long video chat session the following day to celebrate an anniversary of sorts. Ironically, a comment had even been shared between the two about their adventures in Olympia with Nora Dershlitt.

* * *

The next afternoon, Freddie had completed the list of chores his mother assigned and was relaxing for a short while before his mother was due to come home. Heaven knows there would be no peace once she was there and started cleaning and disinfecting everything in sight, including him.

A knock on the door caused him to sigh to himself. He wondered what trouble Spencer had found his way into now. He swung the apartment door open to find not the artist from across the hall, but a tall woman about his age holding a chicken under her arm.

"You!" He gasped. "What are you doing here? I thought you were in jail."

"It's called parole and it was more of a mental health facility. But I'm feeling much better now." She petted her chicken. "I'd like you to meet Maurice."

"I've already met your stupid chicken." He sneered.

"This is a different chicken. Maurice the second. Maurice the first is no longer with us." She bowed her head for a brief few seconds. "A good boyfriend would know that."

"What a shame." He tried to close the door. "And what do you mean 'boyfriend', I've never been your boyfriend and I never will be. You held me hostage, and my friends. And you tried to force your way with me."

Nora unceremoniously stuck her foot between the door frame and the door, blocking it from shutting fully. "Oh, I can't go yet, we have something we need to show you. Boyfriend."

"We?" He asked. "And stop calling me your boyfriend. I'd rather be celibate. If you were the last female left alive, I'd turn gay."

"We. Me and Maurice. Now stop being rude and play nice. Or you'll be sorry."

"Alright, alright. I apologize for being "rude"." He air quoted. "What did you want to show me?"

"Oh, it's this really great picture I have of one Miss Sam Puckett." Nora pulled out her phone. "You see, I just happen to know she's a little tied up at the moment and if you don't shut up and do exactly what I say, she's going to be in big trouble." Nora showed Freddie the picture of Sam, tied to a chair, sitting in a nearly dark room."

"That's not Sam." He quickly snapped before Nora put her phone away. "Sam would never let you get the upper hand on her."

"Alright then. I suppose you won't mind if I just go back and torture her some more. And Maurice here is just itching for some revenge on the woman who's devoured so many of his relatives."

"His? Um, you _do_ know that's a girl chicken, right? But more to the point, what is your problem, woman?"

"Aren't you going to show me your room?" Nora asked. "Remember, play nice." She wiggled the phone at him, to remind him of the picture it contained.

Freddie reluctantly motioned her back the hallway and opened the door to his bedroom. "Won't you come in?" He said in a fake, condescending tone.

She entered the room and looked around, her general demeanor was seriously getting to the young man.

"What _is_ wrong with you, anyway? Are you so desperate for human interaction that you think it's alright to kidnap people just so you have someone your own age to hang out with. No one will ever like you, the way you act. You're completely off your rocker."

"It's all your fault. All I anted was to have a nice, normal party that time with you and the other iCarlys. All you had to do was play nice, kiss me for my birthday and be my friends. But nooooo, you had to go and treat me like dirt, just like everyone else does. You called the cops, I wound up in the nut house and then when I finally got out and was willing to forgive you and be your girlfriend again, you guys still treated me like crap. You insulted my mom, you broke out of my house. You even ruined my fun time with that gorgeous Spencer."

"You were holding us hostage!" He threw his hands in the air. "And if Spencer's so good looking, he lives across the hall. Why don't yo go and harass him?"

"Shut up, you dweeb! God, all you do is talk and argue. I swear if you weren't such a good kisser, I'd smack you in the mouth. Speaking of which, give me some sugar, baby." Nora dropped the chicken on Freddie's bed, puckered up and approached him.

"I'm not kissing you. I have a girlfriend. And you've got her tied up." Freddie pushed her back.

Nora shot an eyebrow in the air, now aware Sam and Freddie were together. This would only make her victory all the sweeter. Hooking up with Freddie and causing him to break up with Sam, it would be like two birds with one stone.

"Oh, you'll do more than kiss me." Nora motioned towards his bed. "Let's make out, Maurice can scratch and peck all over our naked bodies while we _do it_."

"Get out of here and take that dang chicken with you." He dodged away from her, grabbed the chicken and pushed it back into her arms.

"You're right, we really need to be going. Come along Fredward. Your little Sammy's waiting for you." Nora knew if she got him back to her place and he discovered there was no Sam, he'd be onto her, but there was always her old standby, chloroform. She'd just have to keep him drugged until he agreed to be her boyfriend. Luckily, roofies were easy to come by, especially for an ex-con.

"I'm not going anywhere with you, you deranged broad. Now get out of my apartment before I call the cops. Or worse yet, my mother catches you here. I'm not allowed to have strange girls in my room. And you're about as strange as it gets."

"Aren't you in college? And your mother doesn't let you have girls over. You're not twelve?" Nora taunted. "Do I have to remind you that if you don't come along with me, you'll never see your precious Sam again!" She stomped her foot.

"Psh! You don't have Sam. Sam would rip your head off if you came near her after the way you abused poor Cat and that fuzzy haired Dice kid. I'm surprised she didn't break your arms off for that. I mean, sure Cat's a little annoying, but Sam loves her like a sister and what you did was just totally out of hand."

From the living room, Freddie heard his mother. "Freddie bear? Where are you sweetie? I brought some new and improved tick shampoo. Freddie, are you home? Freddie-kins?"

Freddie came out the hall with Nora at his heels and his mother nearly fainted at the sight of the chicken in her apartment. It upset her even more than the idea that Freddie had a girl in his room.

"Yaaahh! Get that filthy, mite ridden creature out of here, young lady." She gasped and pointed to the door. "Oh, Lord, it's probably shed feathers and left droppings everywhere. I'll have to fumigate the whole apartment."

"Maurice doesn't have mites. I bath him regularly" Nora replied with a sneer. "And he's totally house trained. Better than any dumb old cat you'll ever meet. And most dogs."

"Really? You know, I've heard chickens are easy to house train. But why is she named Maurice. That's a hen." Mrs. Benson said, hands on her hips. "Shouldn't it be Marcie?"

"That's what I told her and how the cheese do you know that, Mom?" Freddie asked.

"Because I grew up on a farm." She replied. "House trained, you say. Well, she is a pretty chicken. I had a chicken just like her when I was growing up. Her name was Henny Penny. She gave us the prettiest brown eggs and she ate every tick in sight."

Freddie rolled his eyes and mumbled under his breath . "Here we go with the frickin' ticks again."

Mrs. Benson extended a hand to stroke the chicken's wattles. "Such a good girl, you're a pretty girl, aren't you? I'll bet you eat all those nasty old ticks."

"He's a boy!" Nora huffed.

"Well as fun as this little farm lesson has been, Nora was just about to leave." Freddie opened the door and pushed Nora toward it.

"And Freddie was coming along." Nora grabbed his arm. "We need to go and see his little girlfriend, Samantha."

"Oh, that's nice." Mrs. Benson replied. "Don't forget to take your jacket, Freddiekins. You don't want to get chilled. And tell Samantha I said hello and I'm really looking forward to our dinner this weekend with her mother and grandmother."

Freddie rolled his eyes as Nora practically drug him out into the hall and headed for the elevator.

"Alright. I'll go with you, but if you hurt Sam, I swear I'll . . . " He balled up his fists.

"If I hurt Sam, you'll what?" Nora sneered as the two boarded the lift. "You can't hit a girl."

He grumbled through clenched teeth while the door closed. "I think an exception could be made."

"So where exactly are we going?"

"You'll see, my pet, you'll see. I hope you filled your gas tank." She stroked his cheek.

Sam had waited for nearly two hours for Freddie to log onto their chat session and she was getting worried. It wasn't like Freddie to blow off one of their video chats, especially with what they had planned. After calling his phone several times, she decided to call his mother. Even though they were getting along a little better, she still felt funny about calling Mrs. Benson. But, as crazy as is mother was, she knew the woman would know exactly where Freddie was and what he was doing. He might have been in college, but Marissa kept tabs on him like he was ten.

"Hello?" Marissa answered the kitchen phone.

"Uh, hey, Marissa. It's Sam." Sam tried to be friendly. "How's it going?"

"Samantha, what a nice surprise. I'm well, I suppose. I was just cleaning the dishwasher."

"That's cool. Can't have a dirty dishwasher. You'll have to show me how to do that some day. Um, anyway, I've been trying to call Freddie. He's not answering his phone. I just wanted to make sure everything was alright."

"I thought I heard his phone ringing a while ago. He must have left it in his room when he went out."

"He left his phone behind?" Sam knew this was almost unheard of. "Where'd he go? We were supposed to chat online. It was even his idea. It's not like him to blow off one of our chat sessions, especially this one. We've planned it for a couple of weeks, the anniversary of the first time we had s . . . , um, sub sandwiches together."

Marissa grumbled under her breath, she didn't need a reminder of the nature of her son's relationship with the blonde. "He left with that nice chicken girl about an hour ago."

"Huh? Chicken girl? What the heck are you talking about?" Sam thought Marissa finally slipped completely off the deep end and was also trying to hide her jealousy. "He went somewhere with another girl?"

"Oh, what was her name. Nellie or Nancy, something like that. Honestly, I thought the way she talked, they were coming to see you. Didn't they call to tell you they were coming? That's awfully rude of my Freddie-Bear. I'll have to speak with him about his manners."

"Wait, you said she had a chicken with her? Was her name Nora?" Sam's head began to spin. Nora had done it again. This time, she didn't just abduct Sam's room mate and an innocent pre-teen, she had the love of Sam's life, Freddie. "No, no, no, this can't be happening."

"It was a pretty chicken. She was even house trained." Marissa beamed, not knowing she left her beloved son be taken by a psychotic woman. "But she insisted it was a boy. We both tried to tell her. I guess she'll find out when it starts laying eggs."

"Gee-zuz, Marissa! Wake up! I can't believe you left her take Freddie." Sam exclaimed. "That's the same girl that held us captive when we were in high school. Twice! And tied Spencer to some stupid wheel in her basement and kept spinning him around trying to scramble his brain."

"Oh, but she was such a nice young lady. So polite." Marissa tried to defend her position but Sam had already hung up and was preparing for her trip back to Seattle. "Did I tell you she had her chicken house trained?"

* * *

Meanwhile, Nora was making moves on Freddie as he drove them back to Olympia. "This car has a pretty nice back seat. What do say we pull over and try it out? Lover." She reached over and petted his arm.

He was just glad she wasn't touching his thigh. "Um, no thanks. Besides, your chicken's carrier is on the back seat."

"There's no use in denying these feelings, Fredward." She ran her hand up over his bicep and onto his shoulder. "The sexual tension is really getting to me. I need you, Freddie. I want you to be my first real lover."

Freddie nearly choked on his own breath. "Nora, I am not interested. Can't you get that through your head? I'm sure there's some nice, deranged serial killer that would be the perfect match for you. Hey, I know this guy. His name is Nevel and he's a real, um, gentleman. I can probably set you up, if he's been released that is."

"No!" She slapped the dashboard of the car. "You're going to be my boyfriend, stop trying to be a jerk or Sam's going to get hurt." She again flashed the picture of Sam but he was unable to focus on it because he was driving. "Now pull over into that gas station. I need to use the bathroom."

Freddie pulled into the parking lot of an all day and night gas stop and Nora unbuckled her seatbelt. Just before opening the door, she reached over, shut off the ignition and took his keys. "Just in case you get any ideas about ditching me. Keep an eye on him, Maurice."

"Baaawwwk!"

"Good boy." She cooed at the bird.

"That chicken's a girl!" He shouted as Nora jumped out and slammed the car door shut.

As soon as she was done in the bathroom, Nora made a phone call. She had snapped a couple of pictures of Freddie without his knowledge and it was time to torment the blonde with the idea that she had snatched her man.

* * *

It only took Sam about an hour to make the trip back home. She rolled into the parking lot at Bushwell and prepared to run all the way to the eighth floor. Just as she was passing the lobby, her phone began to ring. It was a number she didn't recognize.

"Hello?"

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Samantha Puckett." Nora sneered. "I've been meaning to call you all day. I'll bet you don't even know who this is."

"Of course I recognize your voice, Nora." Sam cracked back. "So, gone nuts lately?"

"I wouldn't be so snippy, Samantha. Unless you want your little boyfriend to have an accident."

"If you hurt him, I swear . . . "

"Oh, I'm not going to hurt him. Quite the contrary, I'm going to show him what it's like to be truly loved. All he has to do is cooperate."

"He won't cooperate with you. Or do anything else for that matter. Everyone knows you're a lunatic."

"Then why am I in his car, and we're driving to my house? Check your messages, blondie."

Nora had sent Sam a picture of Freddie behind the wheel, one of him in the elevator, pressing the close doors button and one of him holding her chicken that he didn't even realize she snapped.

"Freddie and I are actually getting along pretty well." She said just to get under Sam's hide. "Can't you see he still has feelings for me. He's even going to make me a woman today."

"Yeah, I'm sure he has plenty of feelings for you. Contempt, disgust, anger, possibly even a little bit of pity, but I certainly don't have any pity for you. I'm going to kick your . . . "

"You'll never find us, Sam. We're running off together." Nora hung up, figuring on getting back to her victim and calling the blonde later to harass her further.

* * *

Nora didn't realize that Sam remembered exactly how to get to her house and she also had relatives who lived near by. Dangerous relatives. Relatives that collectively spent a fair amount of time incarcerated. Relatives that knew where to hide bodies if necessary.

Sam's next move was to begin calling said relatives that lived in and near Olympia before going upstairs to visit her boyfriend's mother. She burst through the Benson's door like a hurricane.

"Marissa. Grab your coat and your car keys, we need to go to Olympia." Sam had no plans of trying to persuade the woman to ride on the back of her motorcycle.

"What? Samantha, have you gone crazy? Where is Fredward and that nice young lady with the chicken? And why would I go to Olympia?" Marissa emerged from the kitchen wearing long, yellow cleaning gloves. "I need to finish sterilizing the refrigerator."

"Listen. Carefully." Sam grabbed the nurse by the hand and led her to the plastic-covered sofa and sat her down. "Nora is crazy. Like, genuinely crazy. She's just got out of the looney bin. Don't you remember when Freddie and Carly and I got held hostage when we tried to be nice and go to that lonely girl's birthday party."

"No, this can't be the same girl."

"Then after she got out of jail for that trick, she held us hostage again along with Gibby and Spencer. Gibby had to shimmy up the chimney like some kind of shirtless Santa Claus to try to get help."

"Oh my gosh. You mean?" Marissa gasped. "I left my baby get taken by a psychopath."

"Yeah. And that's not the end of it. She tossed two of my friends in a big pit after I moved to California. And she threw a hose at them and everything." Sam jumped up and threw her hands in the air.

"Oh, God. Please tell me she's not going to throw a hose at my Freddiekins." Marissa was on the verge of tears. "He has an innate fear of rubber tubes."

Sam just got a funny look on her face. "Well, I sure hope not. But it seems she's intent on not only taking him away, but somehow she thinks he's going to be her new boyfriend and they're going to, well, um . . . " Sam didn't even want to think about finishing the thought.

"What? She wants to be his girlfriend. But he has you. Y - you don't think she's going to try to force him to do _things_ , do you? Oh, my poor baby. He's going to be molested. Or worse."

"It's up to us. We have to save him. Now I think I know where they're going, but we have to get to Olympia and fast."

The two women left the apartment and when they got to the parking lot, Marissa handed Sam her car keys. "I think you'll have to drive, Sam. I'm too upset to get behind the wheel."

"Put your seat belt on, I'm not going to waste any time." Sam warned, throwing her bag on the back seat and starting the car.

Mrs. Benson's hybrid car never traveled so fast as they sped down the interstate. "Oh, my poor little boy. Please hurry, Sam. I'll bet she's probably having her way with him right now."

* * *

Nora had directed Freddie to drive through a fancy neighborhood and where to turn into the driveway a while later. "Drive around back. I don't want your car to be seen from the street." She instructed and waved her hand toward the back of the house.

"Oh, yeah. Sounds like a fantastic idea." He replied with a snark.

"Let's go on inside, lover." She reached for his hand as soon as she removed the pet carrier containing her chicken from the back seat.

"I'm not your lover and don't touch me." He snapped, pulling away. "Where is Sam? Take me to her."

"Come on. This way."

Nora remained silent and led him through the back door of the house. They were no sooner inside when she fastened the lock on the door and shoved the key down her shirt, tucking it in her bra.

"Nora, I've had enough of this bull crap. I've come along with you and did everything you wanted, I want to see Sam and I want to see her now!" He crossed his arms and demanded as the psychotic woman opened the cage and released the chicken, who wasted no time in fluttering out and perching on the edge of the kitchen counter.

"You haven't done _everything_ I wanted. Just take a chill pill. Sam isn't here." Nora announced. "But we are, so let's get comfortable." She threw her arms around his neck and tried to kiss him.

"What?" He was overcome with rage. "What did you do to Sam?" He grabbed Nora by her shoulders and shook her. "Where is she? Dammit, woman I knew I should have just called the cops."

"I told you she's not here." She struggled to make him release his grasp, but he held tight and glared at her. Suddenly, Nora had an idea, this was perfect, she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.

Freddie was so taken aback that he let go and now found himself being the one struggling to get away as she now held onto him. He stumbled and fell backward hitting his head on the edge of the kitchen counter.

All the action frightened the chicken and it flapped its wings and jumped into the air. "Baa-gaawwk"

It landed on Freddie's chest as he lay unconscious on the tile floor. "Good boy, Maurice. Pin him down." Nora now grabbed Freddie's ankles and drug him back a short hallway, out of the kitchen. "Well, this is one way to get him into the bedroom." She smirked. "No drugs necessary."

* * *

Sam and Marissa continued on their way to Olympia as Mrs. Benson fretted over the horrible things she imagined Nora doing to Freddie.

"I just hope my Freddiebear comes out of this with his dignity intact."

"I've arranged for us to have a little help when we get there. Just remember, some of my relatives are a little, um, well, let's just say they aren't the friendliest bunch with outsiders, so just let me do the talking and agree to everything I say, alright. Remember it's for Freddie."

Marissa nodded in agreement.

As they approached the street where Sam remembered Nora's house being on, she turned to her passenger. "Grab my bag off the back seat, will ya'."

Marissa reached to the back and did as she requested.

"Open the front compartment and get my butter sock."

The older woman pulled out the sock just as the car pulled into the driveway. 'Wait in the car." Sam ordered and grabbed the weapon.

"Aren't you going to wait for your family?"

"No time." Sam immediately jumped out and swung the sock around while she ran to the door. As she was ready to kick it in, an elderly lady appeared from the side of the home.

"May I help you miss? Are you from the volunteer agency that helps old people with their house work?"

"What? House work? No! I'm not a damn maid. Where's Freddie?"

"Who's Freddie?" The old lady asked.

Marissa had now exited the car and approached the scene. "Excuse me, is this where my son's friend, Nora lives?"

"No one named Nora here." The woman shrugged.

"I'd hardly say she's Freddie's friend." Sam argued. "And I thought you were going to wait in the car."

"Wait, wasn't that the Dershlitts' daughter's name? I never met the girl, she was away at school or something when I bought the house. Is that a gym sock?" The old lady was confused.

"Yeah and it's full of butter. And it's really hard. And she wasn't away at school, she was in the freakin' booby hatch." Sam cracked. "Where did they go?"

"I bought the house almost two years ago. Why do you have a sock with butter in it? Are either of you going to help me clean out my garage."

"No!" They both shouted and went back to the car.

As they sat in the driveway, Sam contemplated her next move. "I guess I could try to track down Nora's family, but I was never any good with that Zaplook chiz. That's Freddie's thing."

"Well, I suppose I need to make a confession." Marissa sighed. "Do you remember how I promised Freddie I would have his tracking chip deactivated when he graduated from high school?"

"Um, yeah. He celebrated for, like, a week. He even went to a strip club with Gibby and Spencer just because he knew you couldn't track him. Of course, that was before we got back together."

"The thing is, I, um, really didn't have it turned off." She hung her head. "I know I promised, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I mean, it was just for emergencies, I swear I never intended to spy on him or anything. But I knew about the strip club and that he spent the night at your house more than once since you started dating again."

"You mean, you can still figure out where he is?" Sam's eyes ripped open, not nearly as upset as Marissa thought she'd be at her revelation.

"I need internet access to use the tracking app. It can't be done on a phone, it's really old technology. I had the chip installed when he was a baby."

"What are we waiting for?" Sam grabbed her bag and pulled out her Pear-Pad. "Let's find a cafe or a library or some place that has wi-fi."

"I saw a MacRonalds right after we got off the interstate. They usually have wi-fi."

Ten minutes later the ladies were sitting in the restaurant and Marissa had logged onto her tracking web-site, while Sam munched away at a big box of french fries. "It looks like he's along a road called broad street. Near number 3800."

Sam was already up and looking over Mrs. Benson's shoulder. "Get some directions." She ordered. "And look to see if there are any houses for sale in that neighborhood."

"You seriously want to look at houses right now?" Marissa asked. "I know you and Freddie are getting serious, but I was actually hoping if you were going to move in together, it would be in Seattle and you would wait until after college."

"No! Nora has a habit of breaking into houses that are on the market to hole up. Now quit arguing and get to looking." Sam snapped and took a slurp of her milkshake.

Sure enough a house was on the market very near where his chip was located. "This has to be it." Marissa announced.

She immediately sent texts to her relatives with the address and then stood up. "Let's go."

The two rounded the corner of the fancy neighborhood and familiar cars came into Sam's sight. Several beaten pick up trucks, an 40 year old Lincoln sedan that looked like something a pimp would drive and a gold Trans Am certainly looked out of place in a neighborhood with two year old BMWs and Lexus sitting in the driveways.

Sam pulled up beside the Lincoln and rolled down her window. "Hey, Sam." The passenger greeted her.

"Jerry." She said with a nod. "Where's Uncle Wayne?"

"On his way. He had a little trouble with a business associate this morning. He's down by the train yards."

Sam knew what this meant, someone was having a very bad day.

"So how do we play this?" He asked.

The Puckett cousins got their heads together and came up with their plan.

One of the younger boys, all of about twelve was sent to the door while Sam and the others made their way around to the back of the house. The young boy proceeded to knock at the door and waited for Nora to answer.

As predicted, Nora came to the door to see who was there. "What do you want, kid?" She stepped out onto the porch and pulled the door shut behind her.

"Um, hey lady have you seen my cat?" The boy asked innocently. "He's about this big and he's orange."

"What? No! I haven't seen no goofy cat." Nora sneered.

"Could you help me look for him?" The kid played innocent and put on a sad face. "I really miss him."

Nora sighed. Just when the boy thought he had her distracted, she became nasty. "Look, kid. I'm busy and I don't even like cats, so I'm not messing around helping you look for one."

"Oh, did I say cat, I meant my dog got away." He produced a leash from his back pocket and held it up, again distracting the crazy lady.

Sam had left Marissa with her relatives and drove around the block with several of her cousins. After giving the kid a little while to make his move, they snuck across a neighboring yard and approached the back of the house. Sam spotted Freddie's car sitting near the garage.

"That's his car, this is definitely the place."

With her lock-picking skills, it only took Sam a few seconds to open the back door of the house and allow her family free access to the home. The kitchen was empty, save the appliances. Sam quickly looked around but the only thing out of place was an empty pet carrier sitting on the floor. She picked it up and looked inside. It contained a few shed feathers so the blonde knew her man and Nora had to be near.

"Spread out, you guys. We've got to find Freddie." She told her relatives quietly.

Sam was ready to pummel someone as she made her way back the hall, her butter sock at the ready. Two young men took to the front of the house and a middle aged man and two teen girls went up the back stairs, each armed with a different weapon.

The blonde looked in the first room she came to and it was empty. She checked the closet and built in bathroom, empty as well. Next she came to a small bedroom, across the hall from the main bathroom. Both were empty. Just as she was heading for the last room, she heard commotion coming from the upstairs.

Her three relatives upstairs hadn't found anything, but they sure were making enough noise. The three had begun to argue about a bet they had made on the way over and were now engaged in a pretty intense slap-fest themselves. As Nora turned toward the sound, ignoring the young boy on the porch, she spotted Sam's cousins, Frank and Tony in the room next to the one she was standing in.

"Hey!" She shouted and ran toward them. "Who are you? What are you doing in here?"

"Uh, gas company ma'am. We had a report of a leak in this neighborhood." Frank said, trying to sound genuine. "You need to evacuate the home."

Nora, of course, was suspicious of a guy in a leather jacket, not a gas company uniform and ready for a fight. "I'm not goin' anywhere. How did you get in here?"

"The, um, realtor gave us a key." Tony returned.

She just crossed her arms and looked mean. The men knew they were on thin ice and so did the kid behind her.

"Owww!" Nora jumped. Twelve year old Tommy had snuck up and kicked her square in the butt, causing her to begin chasing the kid around the room. "Get back here you little punk."

As they struggled, Marissa, now tired of waiting in the car had entered the house, armed with an umbrella, looking very much like Mary Poppins.

Meanwhile, Sam had picked yet another lock and was now carefully opening the door of the back room. Tied to a mattress on the floor, with a gag over his mouth, she found a shirtless Freddie. "Holy chiz. Freddie!" She ran to him and began to untie his bindings.

* * *

In the front room, the three cousins and the nurse continued to tussle with Nora who was ready for a fight and fending off their collective attack. She tossed the pre-teen boy toward Marissa, and spotting the older woman, knew immediately what was going down. The deranged young lady managed to subdue all of them and head for her dungeon to check on her prisoner.

Freddie spotted Nora over Sam's shoulder and tried to warn his girlfriend. "Nmm-Aah" He tried to say her name, but Sam had yet to remove his gag, so she couldn't understand him.

Sam was too busy working on Freddie's restraints to notice Nora bursting into the room. "Get away from him, you blonde skunk bag." Nora lunged toward Sam, hitting the blonde with the force of her body and they both fell on top of poor Freddie.

As they women struggled to gain control, all Freddie could do way lay there helplessly and watch them tussle. Nora attempted to choke Sam from behind, but the blonde quickly countered and ended up flipping Nora, causing her to land along the wall near the closet door.

The two exchanged a few more blows and Sam finally did Nora in with a kick to the gut and a swift knee to the face. That was followed very closely by her using her knock out grip and rendering Nora unconscious. "Sleep tight, nut job."

The youngest cousin entered the room and offered his dog leash as a restraint. A few minutes later, Nora ended up with her hands tied behind her back along with her legs, looking very much like a rodeo animal in the calf roping contest. "Thanks, kid." Sam panted and finished freeing her man from his bindings.

"Here, put your shirt on." She handed him the garment. "You don't want my boy crazy cousins seeing that bod. Nora will be the least of your worries."

Nora struggled against her bindings after she came to, causing Sam to again smack her between the shoulder blades with the butter sock. "Stay down, stub rag."

The remaining relatives began filing into the room to discover they were too late to offer any assistance.

"About time you guys showed up. What were you doing, playing checkers or something?" Sam cracked. "It sounded like you were dancing upstairs."

The remaining cousins all looked at each other and shrugged.

Marissa entered the room, accompanied by Sam's uncle Wayne who had arrived just in time to help the woman to her feet in the living room.

"Good work, you guys." Wayne praised. "Boys, get this mess loaded in the car." He pointed to Nora. "I saved a spot right next to the associate I just broke ties with, especially for her. No one messes with my favorite niece or her boyfriend."

"Let her be. The cops can take it from here." Sam already had her phone in her hand and was preparing to call the authorities.

"Cops!" One of the teen girls exclaimed. "I think that's our cue to leave. See ya' later, Sam."

"Um, yeah. I just remembered I had an appointment." Wayne backed toward the door. "Tony, Frankie, get my car."

As the Puckett family hurried from the house, Sam, Freddie and Marissa were left to wait for the police.

"Hope they soon get here. I need to get back to my mom." Sam began munching on a chicken leg. "Of course, we're only about ten minutes from their place."

"Where did you get that?" Freddie, now completely dressed, asked as his mother examined him for bruises.

"Are you sure she didn't touch you anywhere inappropriate?" Marissa fussed, like she was talking to a seven year old. "Show me where she touched you. Oh, I wish I had thought to bring my sexual harassment dolls."

"I'm fine, mom." Freddie replied quietly. "Seriously. I think I would know if she molested me."

"Samantha, please tell me that isn't what I think it is." Marissa gasped, noticing what he blonde was doing.

"Nah." Sam produced a red striped bucket from seemingly out of nowhere. "Just leftovers, there's a Tubba Chicken next block over. My cousins and I stopped in when we drove around to park the car."

"Wait, you were supposed to be rescuing me and you took time to go through a drive up chicken stand?" Freddie acted a bit insulted. "She could have been raping me, Sam."

"Hey, when Momma's belly speaks the rest of her listens." Sam replied with a smirk. "Besides, I know you can only perform for me." She whispered in his ear.

Soon, the cops arrived, took statements and secured Nora in the back of the squad car. "Mr. Benson, we have your statement, but I'm afraid you will have to testify if this case goes to trial."

"What do you mean if?" Sam asked loudly. "She kidnapped him, had him tied up and tried to assault him. She should be locked up for the rest of her life. This is the fourth time she's done this chiz." The blonde was frustrated at the thoughts of Nora not ending up in jail for this trick.

"Well, if the suspect pleads guilty and accepts her sentence, it won't have to go to court, but if she fights it, and there's a trial, you'll all have to appear I'm afraid."

"Oh." Sam calmed down a little. "So she's definitely going away?"

"I can assure you folks, she won't be getting out any time soon." The detective told them before going to get in his car.

"So what became of the chicken, then?" Mrs. Benson asked as the women and Freddie stood on the front porch, watching the police drive away.

"Well, I sure didn't pluck all it's feathers out and eat it." Sam shrugged. "Too much work."

About that time the chicken fluttered through the door and came to rest on Marissa's shoulder.

"Looks like you have a new friend there, Mom." Freddie pointed to the hen.

His mother gently stroked at the chicken's wattles. "Such a pretty girl, aren't you?"

"Say. You should adopt her." Sam pointed the leg bone toward the bird. "Since Freddie's allergic to cats and all. It would be a shame to send her to some shelter."

"I'm not allergic to most cats. Just yours." He replied. "And I'm only allergic to getting my shins bitten and hands clawed off."

"I think it's time to go home." Sam took Freddie's hand. "I'll ride with Freddie and we're going to stop and check on Pam and my grandma, if that's alright with you, Mrs. B."

"What? Oh, yes. That's fine." Marissa replied, holding the chicken under her arm. "Are you ready to go home with me? Let's find your carrier to keep you safe on the way. I bet you'll eat up all those nasty old ticks, won't you?"

"Dibs on the eggs." Sam announced over her shoulder, walking toward Freddie's car. "mama loves a good omelet."

"Baawwk!" The chicken replied.

 **Just realized 2017 was the year of the chicken. Hopefully 2018 will be good to you!**


End file.
